(Cyrax walks into his room and plops down face first into his bed, tired from closing at work. He looks to his left and sees a Rockstar duffle bag and decides to open it up. Inside is a Wii with seven games. He dusts off the once forgotten system and hooks it up. The Wii powers on)

Wii: Ah! Sweet Jesus!

Cyrax: (stunned) Whoa! What the heck?

Wii: What? You don't remember me?

Cyrax: Yeah I do, I remember you. Wait...am I really talking to my Wii?

Wii: You better believe it, bud. How long has it been since we've played a game together?

Cyrax: (trying to remember) Can't say I remember, do you know?

Wii: Of course! I remember it like yesterday!

Cyrax: When then?

Wii: March 25, 2008. Do you remember that day?

Cyrax: (again, trying to remember) Nope.

Wii: That, my long lost friend, was the day you got your Xbox 360.

Cyrax: Oh yeah...so?

Wii: So? SO? You just left me for dead! You just --

Cyrax: Now that you mention it, I could play some Left 4 Dead.

Wii: ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?

Cyrax: Eh?

Wii: Look, the point is, I miss you. I miss all the times where we played Mario Kart together. I miss the times where we used to play Super Smash Bros. Brawl until dawn. I miss the times where we went to bowl, just for the fun of it!

Cyrax: ...I have got to stop eating at Taco John's from now on. This is really weird.

Wii: What's weird? Reminiscing on old times? Reminiscing on times when we were like a tag team that couldn't be beaten? What has happened to you?

Cyrax: What do you mean, exactly?

Wii: What I mean is I can be just like the Xbox 360!

Xbox 360: Oh boy, here we go.

Wii: You stay out of this, damn it!

Cyrax: What the fuck?!

Wii: LOOK AT ME! (Cyrax looks at the Wii) What I mean by that is I have awesome games coming out soon! I even have a few of those awesome games you like at Play 'N Trade, waiting to be purchased for you!

Cyrax: You mean MadWorld, Conduit, and Punch-Out?

Wii: Yes! Exactly! We could become...reacquainted.

Cyrax: ...

Wii: What? Don't make a stupid sexual joke. Don't you dare do --

Cyrax: That's what she said.

Wii: ...Damn.

Cyrax: Ha!

Wii: Look, I'm sorry for bad games coming out for me. I can't help it! It's that damn Miyamoto's fault for not delivering the goods! Same thing goes for Fils-Aime!

Cyrax: I guess I could take a break from yelling at the TV in frustration. Sorry bro.

Wii: ...What? Are you talking to the TV you crazy bastard?

Cyrax: Well, figuring that two systems are talking to me, I'd think that the TV would join in on this too.

Wii: Well, it's an inanimate object. So stop it.

Cyrax: And you're not how?

Wii: Standby mode.

Cyrax: Oh...still though.

Wii: Don't ask, it's complicated. Look, the point is this (The Wii tosses a Wii remote at Cyrax), are you ready to do this again?

Cyrax: As long as you stop talking to me and make me look like a Looney Tune.

Wii: Then it's settled. I'm glad we're back together again, man.

Cyrax: So...any good Virtual Console games come out lately?

Wii: Yeah...about that.

-Cyrax